Rotten Love (Levy) Music Review

I found the band on myspace, the essential location for a quick look at a band you may or may not be interested in. I added them as friends, and listened in horror at the rest of their "songs"... Or as I like to call them, un-original pussy ballads. I kept them on my friends list anyway. Who knows? Maybe Levy would eventually post a good tune. Plus, having tons of myspace friends makes you look really, really cool.

Eventually, Levy posted a message saying they had released a new "song". After listening to the repeating, clean electric guitar slam for about 2 minutes, I realized this was my chance to offer some constructive criticism. I posted a comment stating "sounds like Coldplay".


Later that day, deciding to actually give the song a full listen, I returned to their myspace page, and noticed that my comment had been deleted. What?! They deleted my comment but kept all the comments from people saying they LIKED the song? What kind of loser-ass dumbfucks who sound exactly like that X&Y shit can't take a truthful comment about their cop-out guitar slamming?

I posted yet another comment saying, "did you just delete my Coldplay comment?" minutes later the band replied saying they did, deleted my new comment, and blocked me! Wow! I was actually somewhat interested in listening to their songs until now. I had given them a 2nd and even a 3rd chance...and they blocked me for telling them they sound like Coldplay? God forbid anyone actually REVIEWS their music! Exactly. This is the Rotten Love review sucka.

On to the EP/album...Rotten Love. Yes, it's true, "Rotten Love", the song I thought was likely their half-decent love ballad track 8 on the cd, was, in fact, the title track of the album itself. This is going to be a rough review.

Rotten Love opens up in a flash. They come right at you with the cliched 4/4 drum...now add piano...now add lead electric riff combo. As the singer comes in it gets a little better, as he sings about his highschool love that lied to him and cheated on him. How original. Of course, the instruments all cut out about halfway through for the neato changeup/chorus. Other than that, of course, nothing at all changes, besided the wicked guitar solo outro which is naturally the same over-used riff used throughout. In short, sounds like Blink 182 singing a Mancino song. And it had so much potential!

The second track, "Matthew", is the exact same thing with a slightly slower tempo. Not gonna waste my time again. Skip.

Here comes the 3rd track...Jesus, at least Coldplay has a singer with a strong voice. But, a valiant attempt. It is always bizarre when a new band comes out and goes straight into middle-of-the-road mediocrity like this for their first album. The double-tracked vocals about this girl we're all supposed to care about isn't universal enough for MOR songs, unfortunately. So medicority doesn't even work here. It's obvious by only the 3rd track that the singer is a real loser. First his highschool sweetheart cheated on him, then he can't afford a bus ticket, and now he is too afraid to go home with a girl he just met. Sensitive or fag-butt? You decide.

The horrendous album begins to slow down and speed up during the next two tracks, the only salvation being the not-TOO-bad drummer during "Rivka"...until the title track, "Rotten Love". This is, as expected, the only worthwhile track on the album. Although, again, it contains much cliched themes and sounds, it is very catchy with a few original lines. It doesn't take itself too seriously, and the band can tell they scored with this one. It's not a bad song and they know it, but it's really just too bad they threw together a shit EP around it. We'll see what the future brings for this band, but simply releasing a single could have saved them some face one day.

I will not waste any more of our time reviewing this garbage. The album ends, expectedly, with a bunch more Coldplay songs. The worst being the atrocious, abomination of an acoustic track, "Wednesday", which makes Chris Martin sound like John Lennon.

In conclusion, if you want some substance to your music, skip Levy. If you want something fresh and original, skip Levy. If you hate repetetive, over-used themes and guitar riffs, skip Levy. If Coldplay is your favorite band...you still might want to skip Levy. But, if you are a barely middle class poser from the lower east side of New York, wear "trendy" pants, and only listen to "cool" music...yep... skip Levy.